May 1, 2007

Welcome to spring, fellow Finheads and Parrotheads!

Before we get too far into this chapter of “Finchef Says,” I must first apologize for the extreme time frame that has passed since I last wrote. There are not words to describe the anger, disappointment and overall embarrassment that Huligirl and myself felt at last season’s end with the Miami Dolphins.  We thought it came to a head at the last game against the Jets when we actually decided it would be more enjoyable to just sit and tailgate with our friends instead of going inside the stadium to watch the game. Fact is, we were right! It was far more enjoyable. But how could we predict the events that would follow: our spineless ex-coach and the condition he left the team in when he grabbed his skirt and ran to Alabama, or the NFL and our front office once again selling a product with lies and blatant deceit! Publicizing in-season ticket renewal forms a teaser of all the upcoming home games and opponents to push sales only to inform them later that one of the marquis games will be played overseas! Not to worry though, the human decency that Brian Weidemeyer showed by not charging us for the game was pretty nice. But with the increase in ticket costs, the Fins more than made up for their financial loss in generosity shown.

Huligirl and I have way too much invested in the small time we spend tailgating with our friends. We also realize that like every one else that still goes to the games, that there is always an opposing team’s fan to sell your ticket to! There was a substantial amount of tailgaters that won’t be back this year because of the ungodly price increases. And after all the hype and lies about Daunte last year, I’m pretty sure all those premium seats renewals took a beating as well.

So sell that stadium Wayne! Sell it to every concert, college program, convention, or Super Bowl that you can. ‘Cause it’s obvious that like every other sports franchise you’ve touched in the past that you don’t give a damn about this team or its fans! I guess as a businessman I would definitely rate you amongst the giants in Forbes Magazine. But as a sports fan in touch with your ticket-buying fan base, and as an owner with the knowledge of how to make selections and chemistry to build a winning team, you are mentally impoverished. You have become the Marge Schott of football! So there!

And here we are with another draft in the bag and frankly, one that I am not ready to condemn yet. I researched all of our picks and the do seem sound. The best thing we did on draft day is actually something we didn’t do. And that of course is draft Brady Quinn. This was a good call! No one, and I mean no one, has ever seen this guy win a big game in college! He is just another over-hyped pretty boy darling of the media! I san actually see the failures of Saban, Quinn, and Moss all occurring in the same year! So that would be fun to watch.

Well, gotta get goin’. I promise to keep the column up from here on! And if you have concerns, complaints or just want to vent to the right person, you can get Brian Weidemeyer’s home phone number in Pembroke Pines from the White Pages! I did!

‘til then, Mahalo Finheads!

P.S. Yes, Huligirl and I did renew this year. I actually broke two ribs and punctured a lung doing it. But that’s another story at another time.

See you soon,

Finchef